New post.

This past week was an eventful one. 

Sorta.

I got assssh from my neighbor all over my hair and face/mouth and demanded we be released from our lease a month early.

(Or someone was gonna get their arms chopped off so they couldn't smoke with anything but their toes.)

Like usual, I got what I wanted.

We now move May 1st as opposed to June 1st

(If you need to refresh yourself)

Lets see.

I subbed for a PE teacher at an elementary school.  

That will never happen again.

OOOOOOOH!

While subbing, I sat down for my lunchie break and looked at my phone:

My BFFFFFF since 6th grade had her baby!!

(HER BLAAAG)

Gretta Elise 7LBS 8 OZ

I just about peeed myself.

(the day prior, she had told me the DR said to wait 8 more days to be induced)

Nonetheless, I am so happy for her little family.

That is pretty awesome.

 

I went to a sundogs hockey game.

( Getting Electrocuted...So I Married an Axe Murder)

Never seen so many classy people in my life.

Twas a good week.

PS- did anyone watch the real housewives of the OC and see PEGGY(or might I say Heidi Montag in 5 years) not take her kid to the ER because she cut her finger?

awesome.

fantastic.

brilliant.

 

Let it be written.

Steven and I will be moving in to a house June 1st!

 It's not just any 3 bedroom, 2 bathroom home.

It has a huge back yard, and a garden area that will definately be tended to by yours truely.

But even MORE awesome...

It was build by my Grandfather!(Lee Brimhall)

Somehow, Steven and I were chosen to maintain and live in the house until the housing market gets better.

Heck, by then, we could even buy the place:)

But in all seriousness, we are excited. 
We feel so blessed. 

My Grandparents have such an awesome legacy and have lived such wonderful lives and I hope that no one thinks we are being spoiled and that we are taking anything forgranted.

We feel honored.

And I am going to have the time of my life this summer planting figuring out how to garden.

I think Bella is going to love having a yard too..

Life is GOOD.

And just for fun...enjoy.

Because this will NEVER happen.

I should stop thinking so much.

You know how you can go anywhere and pick out the LDS women?
Like gay-dar.

Mormon-dar?.

Realizing someone is a member of the Church, its like an automatic friend.
I like friends.

I have this theory.

There are types of classifications that explain the Mormon (women) culture.

You ALL know what I am talking about.

Don't deny it.

I am NOT saying anything about anyone's testimony or saying that they are bad people.

It is a simple observation, that over time, has proven, to me, to be a theory.

 I fit in to neither.

Because of that, I am realizing that there is a flaw.

You see, there are so who are all about putting on pounds of make-up, make their hair huge, wear 'outfits' which usually include some kind of heels, necklace, and/or headband.

Unfortunately, I call it the porn-star look.

(sorry)

With that said, and 3 years of psychology and sociology being my educational history, I could make conclusions or ASSumtions about that type of person. 

But I won't.

It doesn't need to be said. 

But I do admire the ability and effort put in to their appearance, though I could never do the same.

The other classificaiton is those ones that are kinda (not-so-kinda) frumpy.

You know, the ones who come to church in denim skirts and wet hair.

Maybe the occasional flip-flop.

Again, wonderful women. 

They just don't care as much about appearance?

I don't know.

But I am struggling. 

Where do I fit in?

I can think of a handful of women who don't 'fit in' to one of my categories.

Does there need to be a new category?
What should it be called?

Clarification, due to a lack of understanding:
BECAUSE THERE ARE THOSE WHO FALL IN BETWEEN..THOSE WHO TAKE CARE OF THEMSELVES AND ENJOY BEING PRESENTABLE, BUT DON'T BECOME OBSESSED, AND/OR OVER-KILL IT, LIKE MYSELF. 
(Which is indeed the point of this blog...something called self-realization that my so called 'theory' [that I have had since my teen years]is incorrect and needs to be re-evaluated.)
I love how I have to do this.
Brilliant.


I have always found sociology and psychology of cultures fascinating.
I love do try to understand the dynamics of how or why things are the way they are...
like how some people close testimonies or talks, "in the name of Thy Son"?
Or how Relief Socities can get their crap together in less than a week and throw a lunch after a funeral?
(and develop a whole line of funeral food...funeral potatoes anyone?)
Or like how in the late 80s and early 90s, tole painting was the shiz.
Now, its quilting. (Emily)


I really don't know the point of what I am trying to say.

But societies are so interesting. 
Mabye I should go back to school and become a sociologist.
An LDS sociologist.
??

Nicknames.

Last night, I was woken up by some fantastic musical choices from my up-stairs neighbor at 2:30am.  After waking up, I realized I couldn't breathe out of my nose and/or get comfortable enough to fall back asleep.  Instead of counting sheep after taking cold medicine, I began naming nicknames for Bella, my dog.  I then became inspired to compose a blog showcasing all of her lovely nicknames.

Isabella Flower Shepherd

Aka:

Bella

Smelly

Stinky Shepherd

Belly Bean

Fart Face McGee

Smell-a-Shepherd

Stinky

Bella Bean
Smelly Belly

Boo Boo

Smelly Shepherd

Butt Face
Bells

Toots McGee

Belly
Smells

Princess
Smella Bella
Poop Face
Lover Butt
And the BEST nickname is:

Donut:

Want to see why?  Watch this video.  

Needless to say, this is an incomplete list.  I come up with new ones every day.
I eventually fell back asleep.
It was glorious.
But I woke up to Belly needing to do some bizness outside.
Guess what????
Genius upstairs apparently does not own an assssh tray.
Our porch has turned in to his substitute.
Maybe I should go buy him one?

Two Weeks.

Two weeks have passed and I have not blogged. 

There is a reason for it. 

I have gone insane trying to fix something.

Steven and I got a new neighbor right above us. 

He is super classy and listens to really loud/fantastic music at 3 in the morning.

He had been smoking out on the porch which got annoying when Bella began eating the cigarettes he threw down. 

So, I complained. 

Sticking my fingers down her mouth to get out cigarettes is not pleasing.

So guess what he does now?

He smokes in the bathroom.
(because that is so normal)

It has been seeping through the vents and making all of my nice things smell like white trash.

I complained some more.  And hopefully it will stop.

But every day, I wake up and do my morning bizness and it still smells like smoke. 

I have bleached the walls(and ceiling), washed all of my towels, shower curtain, rugs, everything.

I have 10 different febreeze scents that I spray daily.

Literally, I have gone OCD about getting rid of this smell. 

I keep saying:

"If I wanted to smell cigarettes, I would light some and sniff them (because I am not stupid enough to smoke them)".

Not to mention that our fourplex is a non-smoking one.

Needless to say, this guy is brilliant.

Genius.

I espeically love when he plays one song on repeat for hours at a time.

Thank you for letting me vent, cyberspace.

I am ready to move.